Should I contact him, wait for him to contact me or leave it there?

Ok so in a nutshell - I was in a relationship with a guy for nearly 3 months. He told me he idolised me during that time but up until 2 months ago, he broke up with me on the terms that he really really liked me and didn't want to break up but he just didn't love me and wasn't head over heels for me. He said that his last relationship ruined him and so he feels void of emotion and cannot love so didn't want to string me along. He's over his ex but not the damage she inflicted on his life. He said he regretted breaking up with me because he'd never met a girl who was "perfect" for him and so he's working on himself and I've instigated no contact to give him as much space as I can.

This guy seriously grew on me, when we met we had both been abandoned by our exes and it's only now that I'm over the damage that mine caused. I wasn't ready for a relationship when he first started showing an interest in me and was rather distant with him for a long time (think it was a mixture of mistrust and just not being ready). But after a while I gave it a shot because he grew on me and treated me like his world revolved around me. It was that time that I thought I'd met the guy who was just like me in a sense that we just clicked.
Thing is, I really miss him now. It's been nearly 2 1/2 months and he likes the odd status or photo that I share on Facebook but never calls, texts or mails me. I feel like it's time for him and I to have a chat as I've respected his space but I have no idea if he even still likes me.
I'm so confused. Any guys out there - if you tell a girl you idolise her would that mean that you're head over heels for her? I'm still so confused as to why he broke up with me so suddenly but tells me that I'm "perfect" for him. Should I start to make a little contact again, give it more time or leave it there?
shonoonoo
Asked Mar 25, 2016
Trust me it seems like it's easy for men to deal with heartbreak but it's just as hard and sometimes harder, especially if it ruins you like he said it did.

First of all I'm sure he cares about you a great deal and that's probably a big part of why he's being so distant. If you were walking and tripped on a stone the next time your walking I'm sure you would remember where to walk so as not to trip. It's learning not to feel pain the same way twice.

The issue here is that he seems to be stuck on avoiding the " stone " completely , he's gone the other way and doesn't want to feel in case feeling the way he does with you will end up the same way his past relationship did. I say speak to him.
......... Nobody can get rid of love. Impossible. What you need to know and what you need to discuss and hear from him so you can both move on or keep trying is if he cares about you. Sure why he left is important and what he felt when he did, but the most important thing is if he still cares, be honest and be clear about how you feel and let him do the same.

It depends on the guy or the girl, it depends on the individual. You may very well be " perfect " for him but maybe he thought whoever came before you was as well and it scares him that he cares so much, I for example cannot imagine not telling anybody I end up with how I'm feeling whenever and whatever I'm feeling but again that's just me . Good luck and I hope things work out however they do !!
salimsa3
Answered Mar 27, 2016
Thank you for your help - I don't understand what you mean when you say the reason why he's being so distant is because he really cares about me? He never contacts me even to ask how I am. He's a lovely guy, probably the nicest I've ever met and I'd love to kind of show him how much I'd never hurt him but I don't want to push him away
To shorten it you should make contact he is just not sure what to do with his life right now and he needs someone to be there for him. If you make him feel loved his confidence will come back
BarackOsama
Answered Mar 28, 2016

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