What is meant by her eye contact?

I'm a dark complexioned Black male in my mid-40's (There's a reason why I'm informing you about this. More on this later). Anyway, about 4 years ago a young woman in the Church I attend asked me what her name meant during a time when I was informing people what their names mean (She is a light complexioned Black female). At the time I could not answer that question, but later on I found the meaning of her name, and secretly sent the results to her Myspace page. She thanked me for it, and from time to time we spoke with one another (Face to face). A little later after that event I sent the meaning of her sister's name as well (They are identical twins). I informed her that I could not tell the difference between the two of them via that email. She was in a relationship at the time with a light complexioned Black male, and after I saw her the next time she seemed kind of stand offish. I reasoned within myself due to my secret emails in her mind it would be a form of cheating to continually reply to them (But I also felt maybe she was more into light complexioned guys. I figure that's her right. I don't have a problem with that, since God placed billions of women in the world I can talk with other women). Regardless, one morning when I came to Church I knew she saw me from a distance coming across the street to go inside the Church. I felt she deliberately wanted a chance to walk past me to let me know she was not interested in communicating anymore, cause she gave me the silent treatment by walking right past me. Again, I reasoned maybe she was offended either, because of my secret method of communication, or because she did not like the fact that I brought her sister into the situation, or because I informed her I could not tell them apart. Our communication broke down, and we no longer were speaking with one another. As a matter of fact I backed off entirely, put that behind me, and moved on psychologically speaking.

That was approximately 4 years ago. Well, about two weeks ago I was in Church sitting, and waiting along with others for lunch to be served. I happened to turn around and she locked eye contact with me for about 3-4 seconds. Today, she is about 22 years of age. I was a little disappointed actually because I felt, Why is she looking at me? Doesn't she have a man in her life already? Before she behaved as if she wanted to be left alone, and I complied with that behavior. I did a little experiment to see if this was all in my mind. This past weekend I glanced in her direction, and this time she locked eye contact with me for about 5 seconds (I'm assuming this is not her sister, because I never communicated with her sister with the exception of "hi").

Later that afternoon she was talking with a man on a private one on one sit-down, and she happened to look up and saw me, but this time she immediately looked away and continued to chat with him.

One more thing I would like to mention: About 1 year and a half ago I was discussing the earthquake crisis in Haiti with a small group. A woman in the group called this woman over, because she wanted to show her the missionary work via pc video she was doing at an orphanage in Haiti. This young woman came over with a half-pretend of interest, but I sensed she wanted to leave. I got the feeling she felt shy/nervous because I was sitting in the group. WHY??? I neither say anything to her nor think about her. I have never said anything fresh, nor tried anything romantic. There are other women to have crushes on if I wanted to have a crush (And sense then have had a few already). What's wrong with her?

Question? Could it be that she looked at me the second time merely, because she felt I was watching her? Or maybe I should maintain my attitude of not even thinking about her as in the past, because I'm quite sure if memory serves me correct I saw her with her man about 3 weeks to a month ago. I will await a reply. Thanks.
Asked May 29, 2012
What does different people's "complexion" have to do with it? I don't get that.

There are many reasons she could be looking at you and the vast majority are meaningless. The fact that she was "seen" with a man doesn't mean she was dating him. It could be her cousin or her hairdresser or whomever. None of this sounds real, it's just going on in your mind.

Instead of trying to read all of the body language, why not just communicate with her. If someone I've dealt with in the past walks by me, whether they speak or not, I'd say, "Hi [whatever her name is], How everything going with you?" If they look at me, I smile at them. If I'd like to date them, I'd ask if they have a special person in their life or ask if they'd like to go for coffee or something like that.

Somehow, I get the feeling you're a very serious guy. Lighten up. Smile and try to make the time you're around her fun for her. All of these things will be so much easier for you if you relax all of the formalities and simply communicate with her openly and honestly. Trying to dissect her actions from a distance says you aren't communicating, you're watching. Get in the game.
Answered May 30, 2012
Hey Rob, I guess concerning the complexion thingy I pondered that maybe she has a preference in the guys she dates that's all. However, I like a good amount of what you said, and I truly appreciate your reply. Yeah, I agree the way to know certain things without having to speculate is to do what you said: Get in the game. Rob Thanks

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