You should be able to verify that the starter relay is releasing by putting a voltmeter between the starter and ground. It should read voltage for the short time the ignition switch is engaged, then it should fall back to zero. If it doesn't, replace the relay.
If you live in a cold climate, lower viscosity oil will put more of a load on the starter. If that's it, you should hear the engine struggle to start. Anything that increases the load on the engine when it's cold will pull more amperage through the starter.
If you have bought all of the starters at the same place, try a different place next time. They may have bought a boatload of starters, all with the same flaw.