Am I The Reason My Mom Hates her life and wants to die? Please help.

My mom seems to have an anxiety disorder (always crying, freaking out, yelling, threatening to leave, calling herself a bad mother, talking about suicide occasionally) and I feel like it's my fault that she's like this. I feel like an awful kid and responsible of her issues. She always tells me and my siblings that we give her chest pains and that she's going to die young because of us. I feel like I stress her out too much because my sibling are little (9 and 11) and I'm 15, so Im responsible.

I don't think I help out enough at home, my mom makes us dinner every night and cleans the house. I help with house work, but I don't feel I do enough and every night I feel so guilty eating the meal she made us, especially when my 9 year old brother whines about it or my dad belittles her. She's done so much for me and all I've done is ruin her life and made her miserable. She makes me dinner, cleans the house, keeps us all healthy, every year from 1st grade to 4th grade she threw me a birthday party and she throws my sister one too, she let's me have people over sometimes even though she always talks about how it stresses her out to have people in her house, she lets me pierce my cartilage and paint my nails black despite my dad's anger, she's supportive of our dreams and aspirations (which is amazing to me since my dad is the least supportive man ever), she likes me and my siblings even though we're all kinda messed up and weird, she doesn't get weird with me about only having two friends like my dad does, and she loves us all despite the fact that we make her want to kill herself. She does all this stuff for us, and all we do is make her stressed and hate her life. I only do minimal house work and babysit my siblings, I don't do enough.

If I could do anything, I'd go back in time and convince her to abort me so that she'd be happy. Every time she cries or threatens to leave or talks about killing herself I hate myself so much, but no one besides my friend knows how I feel because I stay strong to comfort my siblings and make sure their ok (my dad also seems to get annoyed when I cry) I'm thinking about getting a job next year to help out more. Am I a bad kid? What should I do?

I'm considering buying Nexium and slipping it into her coffee or something to help her relax?
tooshyforlife13
Asked Jul 31, 2016
Edited Jul 31, 2016
I'm only 11 and I can see that totally is not the reason your mom is like that. It's nobody's fault not even hers but it is clear that maybe she has a form of depression or biopolar. I suggest tricking her into going to the doctor like book an appointment for her then pretend to her that your sick. I myself am in a similar situation. Maybe you could help me with my problem as I helped you with yours. I met a close friend of mine through an online game. She lives far away from me with her sister and mother as her parents have split up. One night she confessed to me that she was very very unhappy and wanted to commit suicide. She is addicted to social media but now she has not replied to me on snapchat or instagram for 3 weeks and she has also not been on the game I met her on for that period. I'm really scared because she told me that once she was about to commit suicide but didn't. She is nearly 13. I want her so much. She was my best friend. What should I do? Do you think she's dead? Do you think I should find out?
Flemingolove
Answered Jul 31, 2016
Im really sorry, theres not much you can do. Try contacting her on every social media account that she has. Aside from that, theres nothing you can do. Im very sorry, she may be dead BUT she may also just not be using devices/social media right now, who knows.
I hope everything turns out ok, just try to stay calm and hang in there
Hi ! If you can try to get your friends mom to see a doctor ! I have 3 older sisters and the oldest has a bad and mean attitude all the time so I told another sister about this and she suggested to me to go to a local store and get this sister a pill for mood swings ! It is totally natural , in expensive and can be put in pudding and other thick foods ! All you have to do is put in one capsule in to their pudding and mark the container so that you do not put more of it in the same container ! Take care , thanks
Your not the reason you mom is feeling this way. When you get older many things can cause stress. My mom comes home from work with chest pains and anger issues all the time. Work and having children can lead to anxiety and being stressed, so I've heard this happens to most of my friends.
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Answered Aug 01, 2018
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misswilson
Answered Jan 06, 2019

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