Best way to throw or host bridal shower/engaement party without offending mom or step-mom?

Blended family advice needed: My parents were married for close to 25 years and had 3 kids, me being the middle. My dad cheated on my mom and got another woman pregnant when I was around 15. I now have a 15 year old half brother. Last year my older brother got married, but a few months prior my dad married my half brother's mom, so technically she is now my step mom. At first our entire family was a mess, but after some moving around, kids going off to college, etc, everyone is at peace. My mom and step mom don't hangout or even talk, but they both attended my brother's wedding last year. My mom and I have never been that close. I have always been daddy's little athlete. Over the past 5 years my step mom and I have developed a good relationship. With that said, I recently got engaged and I'm in the mist of planning my wedding. I don't want to offend anyone, leave anyone out or make anyone uncomfortable. BTW MY FUTURE MIL & FIL are AWESOME!! I'm one lucky gal! My fiance & I decided we'll have his mom/ourselves host/throw our engagement party and/or bridal shower at their new house, just so I don't have to ask my mom to invite my dad's new wife. (Just so I'm clear the new wife is also the lady that broke up my dad's marriage). Any advice on how to make this easier or less awkward would be appreciated. I think we are headed in the right direction, but advice from people who may have been through similar situations is worth asking. We all practically live in the same county. Besides my brother's wedding, I don't think my mom and step mom have been in the same room together, but I would love to have them at the events leading up to my wedding as well. Thanks in advance :)
Asked Dec 09, 2015
this is your day and it should be planned with your happiness in mind and no one elses. I know you want it to be peaceful at all the events and as adults that everyone is(I hope) they should be well behaved and mannered. question to consider: if you say that you built a decent relationship with new step mom why wouldn't you invite her? and them being in the same room shouldn't stop you from having the wedding you desire. it's them as adults that need to set their feelings and grudges aside( at least for one special day and or all special events) just because they're in the same room doesn't mean you have to place them at the same table either. everything will turn out just the way it should and will be a awesome time.
Answered Dec 11, 2015

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