I want to die but it needs to look like an accident. will someone help me die please?

Im broke, I have no car, I feel like I have nothing to live for and no way to get ahead or even grab a hold of my pathetic life. Ive been all over the country and world, ive done things some people only dream of. I cant seem to make a way for myself, no mater what I try everything falls apart. I cant hold a job, assuming I can even get one in the fisr place, I cant keep a man, they al cheat or leave, I have no car, I have nothing in my life that makes me want to keep going EXCEPT the love of my parents and my sister. they are the ONLY reason im still here but I cant handle it anymore, I am tired of hurting people, im tired of fallign asleep crying and waking up the same way. im tired of the whole world feeling like this giant foot ablot ready to turn me into a little smear. I have tried therapy, but its hard to go to tharapy when you have no money, insurance, transportation, ive tried meds but again I have no money to buy them or insurance to have it paid for. its like a trap set by people who have money to watch the world fall spiralling into chaos wile they laugh. I want to end things but I cant hurt my parents like that, I cant have them find my body I need them to think it was an accident. Ive been through so fucking much shit talking to someone about it will only take time to explain and they will tell me the same thing everyone else does "it gets better" fuck you, noit doesn't, it just stays the same then gets worse. im at the bottom of an impossibly deep well and its filling with water. I just want to let go.

I'm going to give you a blunt answer: no matter how you decide to go, it's going to devastate your parents. Losing a kid isn't something anyone, ever, gets over. It being an 'accident' will make little to no difference.

Does your family know how you feel? I know - from personal experience - it can be hard to talk to people who care about you and let them know that you're not okay, but that's what family's for: to help you stand when you can't on your own. You sound like you've isolated yourself a little, and that can't help.

You've not been to see anyone worth their salt if all they can say is 'it gets better' because that's not how it works. You can't wait for things to change: you have to change it yourself.

While you really should speak to a professional - not one of the quacks you've seen - and it sounds like you should be on anti-depressants, there are a few things that can help that will cost you little to nothing:

Exercise releases endorphins, which is a natural mood boost. I started going for jogs in the mornings, which helped start me in the day. I was always at my worst first thing in the morning, and woudl often go downhill if I did nothing.

Cook something. Again, best done in the morning to get a start to the day. I'm not just talking about whacking on some toast or frying some eggs - make something special for yourself, that forces you to think. My personal breakfast of choice is yogurt with muesli and freshly chopped fruit, but that's a health thing. Speaking of which:

Eat healthily. I'm not talking about eating rabbit food, but have three meals a day, leave fast food for special occasions, and have a balanced diet. That means eat enough meat, vegetables, dairy, fruit, and fats. Try avocado and cottage cheese on toast, with a bit of pepper. Drink lots of water. And don't think you have to completely cut out treats, but make sure they stay that: treats, and not an essential component of your diet.

Get outside and some sunlight. If you've been depressed as long as it sounds, you might have been staying inside too much, as I did, and I was nearly critically vitamin D deficient when I was diagnosed. Lack of natural light and sun can exacerbate depression.

For now, don't worry about things like a man, or a car. Honestly, you don't need either. You don't sound like you're in any state to have a job right now, and even if you were you might not get one, until someone sorts out the recession: it's not a reflection on you. Focus on yourself: you're definitely not unlovable, and you're unique, as is everyone. Be kind to yourself.

As for a last thing to help your mood:

Be kind to others. Seriously, don't underestimate the power of charity. I'm not talking about giving money. Tell the girl at the checkout you like her haircut. Help your mum with the housework. Thank the bus driver. Even if you don't believe in karma, these little things will leave you feeling good about yourself, jsut for putting a smile on smoeone else's face. And you never know when someone might return the favour.

You don't have a car doesn't make your life pathetic.Achieve something that attract you.Move on and be strong =) Life is hard and everyone is getting used of it.

Don't kill urself I almost killed myself. :-(

What happens to you in life is what you BELIEVE will happen. Read what you've written above. This isn't a trap set by "rich people", it's a trap you've set for yourself and it's working.

Whatever you do, DON"T COMMIT SUICIDE!!! I mean it, what's the point in that? A day is still a day. Ask God. Bring God into your life, he will refresh you and be like an ocean breeze over you. You only have to believe He will make it better. I don't mean to preach at you, but hey, if you're going to commit suicide anyway, why not give Christianity a try? Find a Church, try to believe, accept, and see where God takes you! Jannette Oke once said "There's a time in every girl's life when everything goes wrong." I've been there. =)

I felt the same way last year. You never notice you have the will to survive until it goes away. Getting up every day was the hardest part of my day. I thought "Why should I really? Can't I just lay here and die?". I thought about killing myself too. The same thing was stopping me, I didn't want to hurt my parents or sisters. Want to know what saved me? I started playing a social game on the computer. It is called us.Howrse.com. You train horses and compete in competitions. It sounds completely childish but believe me, it is not. It is more and adult game than child. The reason it saved me is because the US server was so friendly. Practically everybody there is nice and out to help you. The difficulty of training all the horses and completing tasks took my mind off everything bad. To my surprise, a year later, I no longer want to give up. I was able to heal myself enough to plan a future and get my life back on track. I highly recommend trying it out. The site is completely free. If you ever do try it please add me and send a message. I am on there as Alycia Evergreen.

DON'T KILL YOURSELF!!! It will devastate anyone who loves you and believe me there are people who can help you 'stay strong and carry on'xxXx

Hey, you can not hold a job, all right... Can you think of fiction or useful non-fiction to write? You can spend a few month, pour your soul out, and then publish it on kindle and make thousands easily. This is the kind of activity where your precise state of emotional turmoil is a plus:) I am onto it as of now:)

Please don't kill yourself! I'm sure everyone has thought about it one or twice, but if you commit suicide, you'll go to hell. Living in hell for eternity, and suffering on earth for another few decades, it'll be okay. Maybe you should join a church support group! Don't kill yourself!