Why does she like that?

I'm a girl and I would give my life for another girl who's a muslim but we're friends. she's in my class but she told me she is going to change school after the holidays. i'm broken and haven't slept for days because all I can think of is her and that it will never be the same again and I would never see her again,sit next to her or laugh with her. I love her so much but I can't tell anyone.i've cryed my heart out for her and now i'm lost. Last year i've tried to commit suicide but I was saved.This summer I recovered from my depression but i'm so afraid that i'm going to fall back in it.I don't trust anyone anymore.My new friends have no idea of who I really am (I changed school after my attempt).I just don't want to feel anymore,i love her with all my heart.Its also unclear what she wants cuz she gave me a lot of signs that she liked me that way like looking or staring at me and looking quickly away when I catched her or smiling at me a lot of stuff like that..And a couple of days ago I asked her where she is going to school but she just ignores my question and she has been online a lot,her father doesn't want me to be friends w/her if that matters..But what do I do ? and what is up with her ? why does she ignore me?Please I need answeres cuz i'm so lost :( and I know its haram so plse no useless answeres.

We address this issue very often here. You're saying you love someone when you have no idea whether she is attracted to you or whether she would be willing to go against her family and her religion to have any kind of relationship with you. Looking, staring and smiling aren't indicators that someone is attracted to you. Simple friends do that often. A real relationship requires two people with mutual feelings. Until she gives you good reason that she has similar interests to yours, you have to accept it for what it is; a crush.

If you can deal with your depression, your chance of getting where you want to go will improve considerably. In life, sometimes you win and sometimes you lose. Most often how frequently you win depends on how well you deal with your losses. You can't find situations that work if you're in a constant dither over the ones that didn't. Speak to a counselor about your depression. If you can brighten up your outlook, your view of the whole world will change for the better.