Girl says she likes me but doesn't show it, she says I'm too good for her

So I met this girl through a friend and hung out with her a couple times about a year ago but nothing happened. Out of the blue I texted her and asked her out about a month and a half ago. She was hesitant at first because she said she was shy and I should take it as a compliment. After some work I got herto say yes. We kept it casual, just went out one night for drinks. She came back to my place and We ended up having sex numerous times. We made plans to hang out again soon but she told me something came up. Then after a little more trying I got her to hang out again. Once again we ha a great time with each other. We texted a ton with each other just about every day. She told me that she liked me but after making plans to see each other again she broke them again! She said she was sick so I offerred to bring a movie over and just hang out. She said ,"omg why didn't you offer sooner! That's so sweet!" so I told her id call her later and I'd come by. When I did, she said, "oh you should just go out with your friends, you don't wanna hang out with a sicko like me". I said I would love to just chill with her but she insisted I didn't come over. Even after a month of hanging out together and both of us tellin each other we really like each other, lots of sex, several great nights out together, etc; she still makes plans and then keeps blowing me off last minute! I kinda flipped on her and asked her what the hell her problem was. She told me that I'm too nice and she doesn't deserve a guy like me, and she has low self esteem, etc. Even though I've told her how great she is. She still initiates text convos etc so I don't think this is to try Nd blow me off but she is so guarded and won't show me any affection. What is her deal!? Help!!
Asked Nov 29, 2011
She has low self esteem. Show her how much she is worth to you and that she is better than she thinks she is. Odds are someone in her life made her feel worthless. Go over and above to show her she's wrong and you want to be with her.
Answered Mar 17, 2014
i agree, be calm and patient with her and comfort her. show her you love her and that you wont hurt her like the past person had
Honestly, she is probably leading you on just ask her straight up if she likes you and wants to be with you or not, if she makes up an excuse just forget about her because she's using you
Answered Jul 04, 2014
Hmmmm.... I notice you categorized this under "Abusive Relationships" not "Dating." Regardless of what she may or not be thinking or feeling about herself or you, if that's really how you define this relationship, you should pay attention to what's leading you to call it that, and end the relationship.

I want to think a little more about this low self esteem thing... I'm not seeing a positive spin on it yet...
Answered Nov 29, 2011
You don't mention her day-to-day life. Have you "hung out" at her place before? How does she make a living? Who does she live with? Is she dating others? I get the feeling she has something else going on that she hasn't discussed. Could she have a relationship with someone that's only available on short notice. Like someone that's married?
Answered Nov 29, 2011
She lives alone. She just quit her job cuz she was supposed to start school this week but decided to put that off last minute too! So her mom pays her for fixing up her house tempoarily. I get the feeling there's stuff going on she's not telling me too. She broke up with her ex about a month and a half before we started dating. But he stalks her and she says she wants nothing nothing to do with him. Oh and she's got a lot of guy friends and I catch her being suspicious when texting and trying to hide her phone from me. It's all bad I know- I feel like I should not talk to her and let her come to me if she really wants to. Then I'll tell her i'm not happy with how she treats me
That sounds like a good idea. I'd want everything up on the top of the table before investing any more time in it.
Rob Nov 29, 2011

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Answered May 25, 2015

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