Will my boyfriend ever grow up?

Hi There , my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 5yrs now I am 30 and he is 29. He is an amazing loving guy and I am so in love with him. He recently got a DUI and did some jail time so we are now getting back on our feet. I know he is enjoying his fredoom but I need him to crack down and help me out with the bills house work etc. He has had it pretty easy , his parents are well off and he always got everything given to him , he never had to work for anything. I work days and he comes home and plays video game wakes me up, just seems he is all about himself. I dont' know what to do anymore just want to know what will make him smarten up, I have tried bringing it up before and he gets very defensive. He will change for a couple weeks then back to the bars out late and not considering my feelings. We talk about getting married children etc but I seriously can not see myself having a family with him if this is the way he is going to choose to live his life.

Help. What should I do!

He will become responsible when he has to deal with the consequences of his irresponsibility. That doesn't seem to have happened yet. Most parents require more participation out of their children than you are asking from an equal partner.

Explain to him in a calm, non confrontational way that you're no longer willing to carry him. Rather than accepting his usual promises for payment, split the bills in half and put his in his name only. In case you need it, save your extra money to rent yourself a place to stay while he's learning and don't give in. Otherwise, you'll become a mother with two children.

I agree with Rob.

You have to understand that he will change when HE wants, not when YOU want him to change. You're smart to realize there's no way you can raise a family like this, but it also sounds like it's time to consider if you want to keep throwing good effort after bad. If you're trying to decide on your breaking point, most of the time, you've already passed it but don't want to recognize that.