My mum always tell me what to do even when I dont ask for her opinion - what should I do?

When I talk to my mum she always feels the need to tell me what to do or how to fix the problem. I am 37 with a family but since my father passed away, I feel that I dont want to hurt her feeling or for her to feel that she isnt needed, but often she takes over. She says it is because she cares, but then I feel the need to follow out her orders in order to please her. Some issues are trival, but I take things personally when I know I shouldn't. Eg She said to me, " why dont I clean out your fridge and pantry. I know you are busy and don't have the time, but I can help you reorganise them and clean them out. I take this as "What is wrong with my pantry and fridge?" If I say "thanks, but it is alright" then she will go on and say " I dont know how you can find anything in it."This goes on an on with many issues. What can I do???

let go of your feelings try explaining to her that your not trying to hurt her feelings but you would like to do it your way